Sabbatical
by StarFixation
Summary: When two of the most stoic characters in Bleach are both ordered to act their respective ages a friendship blooms and the two realize unfortunate truths about themselves.
1. act you age

_**Hey y'all it's me and I know I should be updating That's my Brother, but this popped into my mind. **_

**Ulquiorra: Don't you find it odd that Hitsugaya and I have major parts in both stories?**

**Hitsugaya: Shut up stupid you're giving away spoilers!**

_**Ahem! This is me disclaiming. There will be OOC moments, tears, hugs, angst, humor, and NO YAOI! **__**

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**Sabbatical **

**Chapter one: Act your age**

Las Noches seemed more stark than usual for some reason. Of course Grimmjow had some thing to say about this.

"Fuck man, what do I gotta do to make something happen?" he shouted to the top of his lungs. The Sexta Espada ran his fingers through his sky blue locks. If things were right in the world he would be out spreading mayhem, not sitting around the hideout."WHY THE FUCK IS IT SO BORING IN HERE?!?!?!?!?"

"You really shouldn't shout trash," sighed an emotionless voice from behind him. He flinched out of habit rather than fear. It was Ulquiorra, fun-killer supreme.

"What do you want," Grimmjow growled, trying to sound scary. He knew that nothing could frighten his "superior". Grimmjow finally turned so that he was face to face with the stoic usually Arrancar. Ulquiorra was the golden boy. He was Aizen's pride and joy that could do no wrong. Even worse he was always walking around acting as if he were the smartest, most mature being in all of-

Inspiration suddenly sparked in his demented mind. It was time to play mess with Ulquiorra.

"Lord Aizen wants to see you," Ulquiorra said. He turned on his heel, but was immediately turned back around.

"You know, you never have any fun,"

"Who cares about fun, trash?" Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. "We exist to serve Lord Aizen, nothing more."

Grimmjow's eyes widened, he found exactly what he was going to do. He shrugged his shoulders and followed the Cuarta down the halls of the immense castle to the throne room.

Before them were Sôsuke Aizen, Gin Ichimaru, and Kaname Tosen seated casually in their respective seats. Aizen looked as if he was about to say something, but Grimmjow interrupted him.

"Lord Aizen, do you ever think that Ulquiorra is too uptight?"

The king of Arrancar nodded slightly, his interest was piqued. "What do you mean Grimmjow? Ulquiorra is perfect the way I made him."

"I mean that disrespectful way he calls everyone trash, even those more powerful than he," Grimmjow began.

He took a deep breath as he felt his conscious mind step down; he was going to need to be smart for the next few minutes. "Also there is the fact that unlike the rest of us he does nothing constructive for the overall morale of the team."

"Morale?" Ulquiorra scoffed. "That's something that trash like you would care about."

"On the contrary my dear Cuarta," Aizen purred. "If a group has higher morale then they work much more efficiently." He turned to the now super-smart Grimmjow. "What do you suggest he do?"

"I think it would be for the best if Ulquiorra were demoted until he learn to act his age- which is proportionately seventeen or so- and once he has it down pact," Grimmjow paused. He looked over at Ulquiorra through the corner of his eye to see that his rival was stony faced, almost angry. "He will have to utilize a new skill from his learning how to be a teenager to raise the morale of the Espada."

"Lord Aizen, I can't believe you are even listening to this," Ulquiorra interjected. Even though his voice was the same monotone, there was a hint of distress to it. "He barely could tell you what 'overall morale level' was a minute ago!"

Shock was displayed on Aizen's face. He had never heard his precious Cuarta raise his voice at anyone due to the fact that he was created to be unfeeling and critical, but it just cemented Grimmjow's claims.

"Ulquiorra Schiffer," Aizen said as he rose from his throne. "I hereby sentence you to live in the human world as a normal teenager until you can contribute to the moral of Las Noches!"

With a wave of his hand Ulquiorra felt his strength depleting. He collapsed to the ground unable to take the pressure from his creator or Grimmow's reiatsu.

And of course he blacked out.

(In the world of the living)

"Toshirou, where are you?" called a voice.

Hitsugaya held back the urge to correct the substitute shinigami. He was a firm believer in referring to others by the correct title, and at least not using their given name without permission.

"Come on this isn't funny, I'm supposed to be watching you!" Kurosaki cried to the silence

Of course that made the white-haired shinigami's head dip in despair.

Toshirou Hitsugaya was used to the claim that he needed to act more like his age. In fact it was the main driving force for his persona. He needed to behave like an adult all the time so his work associates would see him for his accomplishments instead of his age.

Unfortunately the Head-Captain noticed this.

"Captain Hitsugaya, you may be an excellent shinigami, but you are still a child," Yamamoto began. Hitsugaya bit back his usual response of not being a child. "I would like for you to take a vacation."

"Right now?" Hitsugaya exclaimed. "There are already so few captains, and you want to send another one away? Forgive me for my impudence, but I must decline."

Yamamoto sighed, "You confuse what I say with a request. This is an order. You will take a vacation, and behave like a child until further notice, effective immediately."

Then he was dismissed from the Head-captain's quarters. His haori was taken and he had several guards escort him to the twelfth company. Hitsugaya found himself running on auto-pilot as he was fitted in his gigai that pretty much masked his reiatsu and he was briefed on where it was he would be staying.

"The substitute will be waiting for you on the other side," the twelfth captain assured him as the portal to the world of the living was opened. He took a comatose step forward wondering where Matsumoto was. Unless she was in a drunken stupor she should have been there.

Now he was hiding in the one place that someone who knew him would never look: a playground. It was all so simple. He would wait for the substitute to leave, and then go to Urahara's store. At said store he would get a new gigai, one that didn't restrict his powers, and wait for the rest of his "vacation" to be up.

Hitsugaya waited for half an hour or so until he was one hundred percent sure that Kurosaki's reiatsu was gone before crawling out of his den. He was about to start his very long trek to the Urahara Shoten when a small, but very Arrancar reiatsu hit him from behind.

Sitting on one of the swings was a teenager with black hair and emerald green eyes. Hitsugaya couldn't believe it, the teenager almost looked like that Arrancar.

"Why are you staring at me Shinigami?" the teenager demanded in a very emotionless voice. He looked up at Hitsugaya and the shinigami knew.

"Schiffer!" Hitsugaya growled, reaching for where Hyorinmaru would have been. Of course he didn't have his zanpakuto in his gigai, and without any soul candy he couldn't retrieve it. _Maybe I could use kidô spells_

"Are you really about to attack me?" Ulquiorra asked. "You and I both are barely at our usual level."

Hitsugaya paused and read both of their reiatsu. Neither one of them was higher than the average medium. If either one of them were human they would completely lack the ability to see shinigami or Hollows.

"Fine then," Hitsugaya murmured, turning on his heel. He was on a mission, and the weak Arrancar behind him was a waste of time.

"Wait a moment," Ulquiorra called.

"What is it?"

There was an awkward silence as Hitsugaya turned to face the Arrancar sitting on the swing set. Ulquiorra was looking down at his feet, face contorted deep in contemplation. Finally he looked up.

"Have you ever been told to act your age?" Ulquiorra sighed, spinning around in the seat.

One million answers flooded Hitsugaya's mind. He could have told the Arrancar to mind his business, which was that no one ever told him to act his age, or some other lie. Instead he told the truth.

"They don't say it to my face at least," he shrugged, sitting down on the slide which was adjacent to the swings.

"Not to your face? Are they cowards?" Ulquiorra sounded confused.

"No, it's just impolite," Hitsugaya replied curtly. "What about you?"

"Just one person at first," Ulquiorra admitted. "But that was because he was jealous of my rank. Unfortunately he convinced Lord Aizen of the same, now I'm here powerless."

Hitsugaya nodded, "I guess we're in the same boat."

The two looked at each other; a sense of familiarity was blooming-

"Well I gotta go,"

"I should as well,"

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_**Any idiot could tell that friendship was in the cards, except those two that is.**_

_**You all know how it is, I come up with some creative way top get you to review. (Thinking pose) Hmm review and I'll give you a shout out? I'll update as soon as I get five reviews. Anonymous or otherwise**_

_**REVIEW OR ELSE GRIMMJOW WILL STAY SUPER-SMART FOREVER!!!!!!**_


	2. act disinterested

_**Hey guys, sorry that it took so long to update, but school has been hectic, and unfortunately for the next two weeks we're doing standardized testing. Hopefully I can update faster this time…**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**Chapter two: Act disinterested**_

When the shinigami and Arrancar left the park the two of them headed in completely opposite directions. Ulquiorra shared that he was planning on going to a temple.

"They are the best place for a spirit to regain energy, even if they are trapped in human bodies of sorts," he explained.

"Well, I'm going to try to find a way out of this body," Hitsugaya shrugged as he walked off. "And the next time we meet we'll be enemies again!"

"Agreed trash,"

***

Ulquiorra waited a while before he began walking aimlessly. He knew that he could not go to a temple, it was too holy there. In fact if he tried he probably would get sent to Hell or worse, purified.

The Cuarta felt ashamed that he knew nothing except his job as an Espada. He was supposedly one of the smartest, yet he surmised that even Szayel probably understood things better.

_Knowing and understanding are two different things,_ he reasoned gingerly.

Moving aimlessly through the night he wondered how long it would take for Lord Aizen to realize that he was needed in Las Noches and that it was a bad idea for him to be out and alone, powerless in a town full of the spiritually aware.

Also how was he going to mystically learn the ways of teenager-dom? It made more sense for Grimmjow to bring the so-called morale of the Espada up. Ulquiorra found his stupidity very amusing, and frankly thought that the others did too.

Apparently not.

Ulquiorra felt the Void that normally was kept at bay inside of him growing. It was cold as nonexistence, and he prayed that it would take him over when he heard a voice.

"So, do you need a place to stay?"

Ulquiorra opened his eyes to see Kisuke Urahara leaning against a wall with the woman, Yoruichi Shihoin, and she was balancing on a fence.

"What do you want?" Ulquiorra asked, the dark rage of the Void seeping into his voice.

"Whoa, whoa buddy boy we just want to get a dangerous-"

"Yet somehow powerless," Yoruichi interrupted.

"…being off the streets by welcoming him into my home," Urahara beamed. "I mean you looked kind of lonely…"

Ulquiorra said nothing. Lessons learned from the other Espada held true for this moment. One thing you have to do when being offered something is to act disinterested. That way you'll get what you want at a lower "price" be it monetary or favors.

"What makes you think that I am 'lonely' as you so phrase it?" Ulquiorra asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"You were walking around aimlessly," Yoruichi pointed out; leaping down from the fence she was balancing on to be inches away from the arrancar's face. "We don't have time for your games, so are you staying with us or not?"

Ulquiorra nodded. He couldn't help but be honest in the face of someone who was actually powerful enough to take him out. In fact it seemed to Ulquiorra that she was actually looking for an excuse of any kind to kill him.

That fact actually depressed him even more than being relieved of his rank. And the fact that he was depressed over that depressed him even more, but being him he just held his usual blasé expression.

"Lead the way then," Ulquiorra grumbled, holding out his wrists in surreneder.

***

"Okay, so the first rule is to act disinterested," Kurosaki explained.

Hitsugaya was kicking himself on the inside. After he left the park with Ulquiorra he started again on his journey to find Urahara's store the substitute shinigami found him.

It would have been different if he had been at full power, but instead he had not only a double inhibitor on him, but also a gigai that restricted his physical ability to that of your average twelve or thirteen year old.

This was a fact that Ichigo Kurosaki used to his advantage in carrying him home. Their size difference was obvious, and Ichigo had no problem carrying the miniscule shinigami over his shoulder as he had done for Karin several times before

"Disinterested about what?" Hitsugaya sighed, playing along so his host wouldn't feel insulted by his silence.

"My dad," Kurosaki frowned. "He's a good guy, but he acts kinda weird…"

"Weird how?"

"Weird as in he's over affectionate and he attacks you at random and he's an idiot!" Ichigo said in one breath.

"Sounds a lot like my former captain," Hitsugaya shrugged.

"Your last captain?" Ichigo asked. "What happened to–"

"Were there any other rules you needed me to know?" Hitsugaya interrupted, feeling uncomfortable with the way the conversation was going. One thing he hated talking about more than his childhood was his former captain, especially his gristly fate.

Luckily Ichigo took the bait and listed a few other things that he thought the shinigami should know like to stay out of his sister's way when she was on the warpath, or not brushing teeth = not being allowed to eat dinner, and the he needed to come up with some kind of sad back-story to why he was going to be staying.

"it doesn't have to be complicated since my family will believe anything," Ichigo shrugged.

They finally came up to the Kurosaki home/clinic and went in.

"YOU'RE LATE ICHIGOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" shouted a voice that sounded so incredibly familiar to Hitsugaya's ears. It couldn't be who he thought it was, that person was dead. Deader than dead in fact, he had seen that person die. He was the one to have to deliver his last words. He was the one who had to take over in his captain's absence.

Hitsugaya looked over his shoulder to see the face behind the voice, and he had to resist the urge to shout "You!" or something to that effect.

Instead he was going to follow Ichigo's first rule and act disinterested.


	3. act like someone else

**_A special thank you to Photophobic for inspiring me to continue this story instead of adopting it out. Everyone go thank Photophobic please! _**

**_Oh yeah, and please check out the poll on my profile!_**

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**Sabbatical**

**Chapter three: Act like someone else**

Hitsugaya was thinking of what his cover story was going to be when he was nudged by the man who was the substitute's father – yet looked unbelievably similar to his dead former captain.

"Are you alright Shiro-chan?" the man asked in a voice that was the exact same patronizingly nice tone his dead former captain used. "You kind of zoned out there for a moment."

He didn't wince nor did he react as he usually would. Hitsugaya had decided to just roll the dice and act like someone else.

"No," he said slowly, realizing what he would go with as his cover story. "But why are you calling be Shiro-chan again?"

"That's your name isn't it?"

"Oh yeah," he chuckled, though it sounded off since he wasn't one who usually laughed. "No one usually calls me that, just … sweetness."

Hitsugaya launched into a completely insane story as to why he had been orphaned. In summary his parents had died and left him with his crazy and over affectionate aunt, who in turn forced him to become an escort, but then she was killed by the one who became his pimp, but before he could turn his first trick he was saved by kind Ichigo-san, and got bonked on the head by something.

"And now I have nowhere else to go…" he whimpered, which also sounded wrong since Toshirou Hitsugaya did not whimper.

But that was okay since he was acting like someone else.

Hitsugaya capped off his story by wiping his eyes on his sleeve. From under it he could see that Kurosaki and Karin both had their jaws nearly to the ground. Perhaps they had thought he of all people would never resort to something like that. Perhaps they thought he would have come up with a more subtle and believable lie. In spirit and in truth he would have, if he weren't acting like someone else.

"OF COURSE YOU CAN STAY!" Kurosaki's little sister and father shouted in unison crying in each other's arms.

He would have found that the strangest thing they did that evening had they both not run up ro a poster of a woman that had "Masaki Forever!" written across it.

"Look Masaki we have another son now!" Kurosaki's father exclaimed.

"Dad, you're going to scare him!" Kurosaki insisted, surreptitiously looking over his shoulder in confusion.

Hitsugaya rolled his eyes to signal that he would explain later, and hopefully while he was stuck living there he wouldn't get stuck alone with Kurosaki's father what with the resemblance to his dead former captain.

It would be far too awkward.

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Ulquiorra walked in between Urahara and Yoruichi. It wasn't his choice, but rather it seemed that Yoruichi had moved from her spot right next to Urahara. She obviously still felt that he was dangerous and that her (lover maybe? Ulquiorra was not sure) friend could protect himself.

"Oh and take these," Urahara said offhandedly, handing Ulquiorra a pair of brown glasses.

"What are they for?" the Arrancar asked.

"Disguise, of course," the shopkeeper replied as if Ulquiorra had asked him the most obvious question in all of the universe. "We can't have anyone recognizing you."

Ulquiorra looked down at the glasses in his hands, "Don't I need more to disguise myself?"

"Of course not!" Urahara exclaimed. "Now put them on."

Ulquiorra instinctively had to obey since it was ingrained in him to do as he was told by one exponentially powerful than he like Lord Aizen.

"Kisuke, I don't think they're going to work…" Yoruichi muttered.

"Nonsense," Urahara insisted. "Besides all he needs to do with it is act like someone else."

Ulquiorra stifled the urge to sigh. That was the whole reason he was in the World of the Living in the first place. On a positive note however, if he did succeed at behaving like someone else that would count as learning to act his age.

"Maybe we can sweep his hair back too?" Yoruichi suggested inches away from Ulquiorra's face.

With the speed that had earned her the title "Goddess of Flash" she snatched off her hair tie and wrapped it around Ulquiorra's, creating a small ponytail.

"Wow," Urahara gasped. "I guess you were right he _did_ need more than just the glasses."

Yoruichi pulled a mirror from seemingly nowhere and placed it before the arrancar's face. He was surprised at how different he looked. His eyes still shined, but under the glasses they looked more teal than emerald and more of his face was exposed with his hair pulled back.

But he still looked like an emo clown/mime.


	4. act honest

**Sabbatical**

**Chapter four: Act "Honest"**

Hitsugaya found the substitute's bedroom to be a tad bit small. It wasn't a bad thing since he actually liked small rooms, but the prospect of being in there with a human teenager worried him to no end. He barely understood the adult shinigami he worked with, and overall he only knew roughly five humans.

"Okay so you can sleep there," Kurosaki said pointing to his bed.

"I'd rather not," Hitsugaya sighed. "At any rate where would you sleep?"

Kurosaki opened the closet to reveal a comforter and pillow along with a small lamp and embroidered sign that said Closet sweet Closet.

"You have to be fucking kidding me," Hitsugaya gasped.

"You've gotta be kidding me," Kurosaki countered. "Where does someone your age learn to curse like that?"

Hitsugaya rolled his eyes. In the academy the only students that held their tongues around him were the girls, and they only did that because they thought he was cute. He had heard a plethora of swear words, and learned to use them too in what seemed like a few days.

"I hear things," Hitsugaya shrugged.

"Well no more because my dad will wash your mouth out with soap," Kurosaki warned.

Hitsugaya shivered, yet another similarity between the substitute's father and his former captain. Way back then when it was the norm for him to say exactly what was on him mind it was either that as punishment or getting his hide tanned.

"Fine," Hitsugaya agreed, sitting on the bed. "But could you explain the closet bed to me?"

"Only if you tell me why you were acting all weird around my dad," Kurosaki countered.

"I wasn't acting weird," he lied about his lie.

"And Orihime is a gourmet cook,"

Hitsugaya didn't know whether the substitute was being sarcastic or he actually meant that.

'_You should tell him about your former captain._' Hyorinmaru said.

"_And why would I do that?_"

'_Because he is honestly worried?_'

Kurosaki waved his hand in front of Hitsugaya's eyes, "Earth to Toshirou."

Hitsugaya rolled his eyes, "your father acts a lot like my old captain, okay?"

Quickly he resolved from that point on to act honest. He didn't need to tell the substitute everything, besides half of the truth seemed to satisfy the substitute anyway.

"Seriously?" Kurosaki exclaimed. "What happened to him or her?"

"Retired," Hitsugaya lied. "Besides-"

He was interrupted by pounding on the door. Hitsugaya knew that it would happen eventually, all he had to do was act ignorant and he wouldn't have to deal with certain emotions while he was already feeling like crap.

"Ichigo, I need to talk to Shiro-chan, can you send him out?" the father called.

"Sure," Ichigo replied back, the whispered. "He's only as crazy as you let him get."

Before Ichigo could further explain the door was broken down for what the young captain could guess was not the first time. If the Kurosaki father was anything like his former captain it was likely he was going to-

"Not again!"

The older man leapt from the doorway and pounced on his son with grace that rivaled Yoruichi. Ichigo countered of course by using his father's momentum to kick him off and roll onto the balls of his feet. Ichigo grabbed his father's leg and heaved, as if to try to throw him out of the room, but the father flailed. His foot hit Ichigo square in the chin, knocking his son into the air.

"You're holding back son," the father said getting to his feet in fighting stance.

"Then bring it on old man!" Ichigo shouted.

"How about you two stop fighting in front of our guest?" shouted Ichigo's younger sister, not Karin. Yuzu?

She stood in the doorway trying to look intimidating as he sister, but wasn't doing a good job in Hitsugaya's opinion.

"Sorry Yuzu…" they both murmured.

**A:C:T**

Ulquiorra was wondering why a little girl needed a cannon.

When he walked into Urahara's store he had immediately been knocked down by a little boy with bright red hair shouting something about another home run for Jinta Hana-something or other. Of course that was when the little girl pointed the cannon at his face.

"Name: Ulquiorra Schiffer, Species: Arrancar, Affiliation: Espada, Rank: Cuarta," she mumbled, with a clouded yet frenzied look in her eyes.

"Get that away from me, trash." He growled.

"I would suggest that you not antagonize Ururu," Yoruichi ordered.

"I did not antagonize her in any way; the little boy hit me…" Ulquiorra moaned.

Since he was for the most part powerless he didn't sense that the little boy was going to hit him before it had happened and his reflexes were slowed dramatically so he couldn't react fast enough to either evade or attack first.

Also since he was powerless he was feeling every bit of the pain that came with getting hit with a huge club. Ulquiorra was not used to pain, and since he was in this state anyone who caused him pain would not be ruled as trash for the time being.

"Be happy that I didn't kill you," the little boy grunted. He turned to Yoruichi, "Why's he here anyway?"

The little boy punctuated his question with a swift kick to Ulquiorra's stomach.

"I'm wondering that myself," the goddess of flash muttered, looking over her shoulder at Urahara who only shrugged.

"I brought him back here out of curiosity," Urahara chuckled nervously. "He wasn't exactly forthcoming as to why he is here powerless in a gigai."

"Lord Aizen is punishing me," Ulquiorra said softly. "Until he deems it so I am to stay here in the world of the living. It is likely that he was seeking a cruel way to punish me and decide that I am no better than the trash of this world and deserve to die with them."

Ulquiorra said this with no malice, but with loads of –

"Something smells like self-loathing," Ururu said suddenly.

"Ururu, honey, one as young as you shouldn't talk about self-loathing," Yoruichi playfully scolded.

Ulquiorra crumpled a little on the inside since that was, for all intents and purposes, doing. At the moment he hated himself for being so… imperfect that Lord Aizen would think that he needed to act like a human teenager.

He hated that Grimmjow of all the Espada had convinced Lord Aizen to send him away. There would be some Honor if it had been one of the higher ranked Espada such as Staark, Barragan, or Halibel since they were more powerful than he and, in Ulquiorra's mind, deserved to pass judgment on him.

"I do not think Lord Aizen wants me anymore," he concluded.

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